


all, most, some and none

by angree_baratheon



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Kageyama is awkward and he's working on it.... Kind of, M/M, kageyama is shook hinata is no longer around with him, post chapter 370, thats it, thats the fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:33:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22065562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angree_baratheon/pseuds/angree_baratheon
Summary: And it hits him suddenly, that that will be all. There is no school to come Monday morning. There are practises, maybe; there are routines that he's come accustomed to. But Hinata's flight will leave a week from now, and Tobio has a train to catch Tuesday evening. There are no races to finish, no flippant but loud attitude that he's gotten so used to listening, no banters to fill his time in between practises after practises.See you later, Hinata says, voice loud and eyes clear, but when? When?Or, post chapter-370, and we follow Tobio's adventure of stalking Shōyō through social media through the years they're apart while he struggles with feelings until they meet again.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 10
Kudos: 121





	all, most, some and none

**Author's Note:**

> i. i was actually in the process of writing tsukishima/yamaguchi's romance because they're really the true long-lasting otp of the whole series, fight me, but let's be honest: i'm also seriously charmed by the competitive and chaotic relationship of shōyō and tobio. it's actually really interesting because, if you think about it, put it side by side, tsukishima and yamaguchi is just—really stable, you know? even if you haven't viewed them romantically, their years of having had to nurture their bond with each other truly sets out a solid foundation for their connection.
> 
> i think that's part of the reason why, even though their dynamics may not seem equal to a lot of people at first glance, i feel yamaguchi can just yell at tsukishima and tsukishima is just like, "yeah ok" because! they trust each other so much. they've depended on each other, and they knew the other is gonna be there, in nearly all aspects of their life even outside of volleyball, it's - it's actually really wonderful because, on the other hand, hinata and kageyama are the complete opposites. their relationship were rocky from the start, and it hasn't actually calmed down ever since.
> 
> i feel like kageyama and hinata's rivalry are such a strong element of what made them _them_ , so i wanted to play with kageyama not quite? knowing how to separate hinata as a volleyball partner/rival to someone he actually has really fond feelings and thoughts for. i want to explore how: kageyama has got three full years of his life revolved around hinata and volleyball, and then - then hinata went to rio, and high school is over, and he just - he thinks it's okay, maybe, to not stay connected, because he has his own ambition and career and hinata has his own, but also, it must've been such a shock for him to not play with hinata any longer.
> 
> to not have this loud, persistent presence after having had it consumed him for years when they were teens. i wanted to explore that, and mesh it up with kageyama's general awkwardness in maintaining friendships, views on social medias, and him slowly realising that he's - he's kind of gay for hinata and misses him a lot.
> 
> ii. also, because he just. he has no idea how to truly convey that he actually has a big fat crush, like he mistakes them alwyys with the intensity of their rivalry, all he can really actually say to cheer hinata up is usually something always along the line of volleyball thoughts or activities. damn, that "i win again" line? yeah, dude, that was kageyama's attempt at probably cheering hinata up and _it worked_ and i think about that a lot. 
> 
> kageyama, on the inside: how do i say i miss this dude and want him back in japan  
> kageyama probably: you're still years too early to beat me in volleyball
> 
> and hinata falls for it every time.
> 
> iii. i was also writing this halfway through and honestly, i think it's lowkey unrealistic that kageyama doesn't sometimes try to contact hinata when he sees a particularly interesting picture of volleyball matches / practises, beaches or otherwise, because i can totally imagine him like, _hey whats that muscle training you're doing_ , like out of nowhere, but then official manga had kegayama truly being Shook(tm) when oikawa sent that picture, and kageyama not being informed of hinata's trainings (which meant they haven't been contacting) and it broke my heart and i was like, "yeah. angst material right here."
> 
> iv. ok i talked too much, here is my writing exercise because work has been so heavy and thanks haikyuu for distracting me.

_I don't know what I'm supposed to do,_  
_Haunted by the ghost of you._  
— **Lord Huran** , "The Night We Met."

.

Hinata's instagram and facebook feeds are like this: filled with pictures and Japanese characters that not all are usually grammatically correct. (He always has too much to say, and he speaks about them like he'll be cut off too soon, or somebody will snatch his voice away the next minute.) Yamaguchi once tried introducing the guy to twitter, but the lack of photo-focused and limited words written killed the platform quick for the idiot. So, facebook and instagram, and then, for a quick amount of time, even snapchat, became the All Around Mandarin's new victim.

Tobio has never really thought much of it.

Hinata is always a hundred-percent energy for him, and during some glorious too-blind-for-any-mere-eyes, he could even go beyond. Tobio has long learned to take it all with stride, if not physically and verbally challenging for more. So, the news that Hinata loves uploading strangely shaky pictures of himself when he takes the infinite amount of selfies with the rest of their teammates, some rival schools, his own classmates and so forth does not shock him.

In fact, it would probably be even weirder if he'd found himself opening any social media feed to find a steady and calm picture by Hinata.

He doesn't think much of it.

No, not until that day at the Graduation Ceremony.

Hinata's picture is of a Sakura tree that they've always ran by, near the gym, just pass the botanical garden Tobio knows their Eco Green Club takes care of. It's surprisingly calming. There is no other photo indicating an end: no tacked-on diploma to show, no uniform at the corners to indicate what today meant. No, _See you later_ , like the one he gave in the gymnasium, before they both sped out, one last time, chasing each other's shadow until Hinata wished him luck and turned his back. 

Tobio told himself it doesn't hurt. Hinata's goal has been clear and heart-achingly possible for months now. His are the same.

( _Brazil_ , he'd told the team one day, casual and easy, while doing a stretch. _I've been working hard around Coach Ukai's shop to help pay for the plane ticket, even if it's a little. Geesh, you would not believe the price!_ )

It doesn't hurt.

But the sakura tree, from this digitalised image, seems so clear and melancholy. Tobio wonders why they've never stopped there. They passed it every day, lungs always aching for a steady inhale-exhale because they never tried to stop running, never tried to stop out-win one another. What would've happened if they had? What would've happened if Tobio just, slows down his steps one day, and Hinata will follow, and his eyes will be bright. _What_ , Tobio could imagine he ask. _Hurry up! Or it won't be a fair match!_

_Shut up. Look._

What would happened then, if Tobio caught that moment, and he held it, because it's theirs. Because he could.

The sakura tree awaits him in the dimmed-lighting of his room. The caption reads: _Pretty (♡°▽°♡)_ , and that's it.

And it hits him suddenly, that that will be all. There is no school to come Monday morning. There are practises, maybe; there are routines that he's come accustomed to. But Hinata's flight will leave a week from now, and Tobio has a train to catch Tuesday evening. There are no races to finish, no flippant but loud attitude that he's gotten so used to listening, no banters to fill his time in between practises after practises. _See you later_ , Hinata says, voice loud and eyes clear, but when? When?

Tobio closes his eyes and pretends the tear that's escaped his eyes are from the yawn he's been stifling from the day that is exhausting.

.

Hinata is generous in updating his social media.

There are tons of pictures, and tons more of information if you read his writing carefully or dissect the photograph when you have the time. Tobio doesn't usually have the time, so it's normal to catch himself going through the updates all at once maybe around the one hour he's finally had time for himself away from the team, away from volleyball. It's overwhelming, sometimes, and Hinata's stopped conversing everything through Japanese exclusively. English trails in his post, and then, slowly but assuredly, Portuguese slips. Tobio stops reading every caption he's had altogether at one point.

And, he knows, there is a way—there is always a way—for him to reach out, to ask the questions that's been sitting in his chest, easily.

Time differences and years apart, Hinata isn't the kind to ignore when people has reached out. He's friendly in a way that Tobio will always be envious of, and he's attentive, even if his focus on volleyball seems to dominate most of the attention he's got. Tobio can just say _hello_ , and he knows Hinata will respond. But he doesn't. Couldn't.

He lets Hinata's mountains of pictures consume him, and, he supposes, at one point it's grown therapeutic. 

It's nice to be informed, even if it isn't directly, that Hinata has never stopped trying to exercise what they've been competing their whole lives since that meeting back in middle school. It's nice to know that, even when the world turns and people grow, Hinata has technically never stopped chasing after him or vice versa. They are always at each other's heels, hovering enough that they're continuously moving forward. _I'll win someday_ , Hinata had told him like a mantra over the three years they're side by side, and Tobio's chest squeezes at the reminder; at the memory of looking behind and knowing Hinata's wearing the same coloured shirt as he is. _I wish you could win when you're right next to me_.

But he doesn't think about it. He won't.

Tobio closes his tab when the hour is up and resumes his routine.

.

He's nineteen when he receives the first, and what will be the only, direct and personal picture of Hinata.

And it isn't even from Hinata, himself. Tobio supposes this makes him look cowardly, because he knows Yamaguchi and Kenma from Nekoma keeps an active connection and has probably got more personal pictures without even outrightly asking, but he won't admit to it. They haven't talked since that quick message when he was on the train, fresh graduate of his high school, to Hinata typing out a _good luck_ , and him replying snidely, _Good luck yourself_. It's not the first time Tobio wishes he would have the same amount of dedication at maintaining interpersonal relationships like he does in volleyball, but he entertains the idea of Hinata and him... he doesn't know, but they're still talking in this imagination of his, sometimes.

Hinata will talk his ears off about the practises and the kinds of training he's been up to, and Tobio chirps in about his own when he's asked. Hinata will probably go on too about the kind of food he's eaten, because that's familiar, because digging on the meal besides Hinata after every win or matches were the things that made them _Them_ , and Tobio will answer. They'd video chat, even if Tobio doesn't like video chatting much, even if his Mother insists he does—and they would text. Hinata will probably take a disgusting picture of a stub toe, or an injury that he hasn't treated, only for Tobio to yell, even if it's in not in a verbal form they're both accustomed to from their high school years.

That didn't happen, though.

So, Tobio has this picture, of Oikawa and the Mandarin Idiot making an identically stupid face, tongue stuck out and eyes bulged out.

Tobio saves it. And if he's made it his wallpaper after the lock, then it's his own business.

.

Twenty-two, and Hinata still has that god-awful habit of singing when he wants to shit.

So, Tobio scouts the toilets. It's not a big deal. Everybody in their volleyball league, the ones who has specifically ran into them when they were still the crows with sharp claws and pointed beaks, is excited by the prospect that Hinata returns. Everybody wants a chance once more to battle him again, just one more match, to test out how the years since they've crossed paths have changed each other. _So_ , Tobio will argue, _it is not weird_ —he's just taken the extra step than the rest of his teammates to seek out Hinata, himself.

(And he feels it, now more than ever, the sensation he thought has faded since they both have taken their diplomas and left Karasuno: the sight of Hinata's shadow always a step behind, then a step in front, but mostly besides him. The patterns of their march matching, their rhythms syncing, their shoulders so close it's nearly touching. It burned, then; Hinata's fight to win, to overcome their rivalry and snatch his throne. It's burning now once more. _Again_ , Tobio thinks. _He will be there at the court with me_.)

"Not gonna have any bowel issues today, are you?"

He can't stop smiling. He couldn't.

Hinata turns, and he's—he's beautiful.

It hurts now, Tobio can admit. It hurts so much to see his back, to see him slipping by his fingers all those years. Hinata wanted that growth, of course. Wanted that level-up in ways that only he could achieve when Japan League didn't invite him, and Tobio knows he could never stop him. _As long as they've got volleyballs_ , he had thought, _they will always meet_. But it hurts. It hurts that the future could tear them so easily when it worked so hard before for them to be teammates, for them to be—to be this _force_ that Tobio couldn't imagine wanting to have with anybody else.

 _What's so wrong with being a King?_ The Decoy King himself has declared then, crowning him: accepting the flaw Tobio has found himself sick of having, and embracing it as if it's simply a dirtied blanket that needed washing. That's when he knew, didn't he. He was slow, yeah, but he knew, in what little ways he could have then.

Hinata, he—

"Why? Can't a guy just go to the toilet in peace?" The Walking Orange leaps, and his arms are strong, his presence—Tobio has to catch a few breaths for himself at the impact—overwhelming for a few seconds before his own body eases into this surprised hug. _It's just Hinata_ , his mind tries supplying, tries comforting. _You know him. It's just Shōyō_. "Kageyama!"

He smells like protein bars and long hours on the bus.

Tobio squeezes him tighter.

.

He still doesn't have any guts to truly bombard Hinata for a random picture, or to be this constant conversation partner because Tobio shuts that possibility down when they were no longer wearing the Karasuno uniforms. And, honestly, he's too awkward to bring back the simple pace that they seemed to have, thinking the years were too much, and the separation—though long ago—were too abrupt.

But Hinata gets his e-mail again like it's nothing, and corners him into exchanging LINE information shortly after.

Tobio's heart soars, the match—whether who lost, or who won—is suddenly just another match, not the gruelling battle it had definitely became an hour before. _Can't wait to beat you again_ , Hinata messages when the day is done, and the night cools.

 _You can try_ , Tobio replies, telling himself that it's good enough: the message, the characters, even though he checks it five times before he sent.

 _Damn, I missed you_ , Hinata responds simply, and Tobio stares at it for seems like hours.

 _Idiot_ , he slowly types, nervous. Heart in his throat. _I missed you too_.

It's a start.

**Author's Note:**

> i. i have so many train of thoughts and little headcanons etc like kenma and yamaguchi stays actively in touch with hinata? kageyama tried dating a girl when he was 20-ish, and she was the one who told him that he sucked at interpersonal relationships outside of volleyball and he should work on that. (he's trying to.) hinata drinks regularly in brazil, but not like, in a worrying amount. he just hangs out with people and they drink, and he likes that. pedro has a crush on hinata and it's actually really sweet.
> 
> ii. this was truly cool to write because ive been wanting to write something short for a while so this has been so much fun to exercise on, here's to years of hoping i write more stuff in 2020.


End file.
